This is installment #6 of one-liners that didn’t make the cut for the “Biz 1-Liners” book. There was so much positive response to the first tthree, that I’m doing it again.
While “Biz 1-Liners” is filled with one-liner observations appropriate for any number of business applications from memos to presentations to e-mails and beyond, the following list contains mostly inappropriate comments ... and inappropriate can be fun.
So, it’s time once again to take your nose off the grindstone and wipe the grease off your elbow for a quick break. Chances are a few laughs will re-energize you for your next attack on your priority list
I like birthdays, but I think too many can kill you.
I avoid clichés like the plague.
I’m a bad influence ... but ... damn, I’m fun!
Sanity is back-ordered. Sarcasm is in unlimited supply.
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Bucket List: 1) Ice 2) Beer
I’m not weird ... I’m a limited edition
I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.
It’s OK if you disagree with me. I can’t force you to be right.
I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.
My favorite child is furry and has four legs.
I started out with nothing ... and I still have most of it left.
I’m not clumsy ... the floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies and the walls get in my way.
I have learn that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everybody off is easy and fun.
If I ever go missing, I want my picture on a beer can rather than a milk carton, because I want fun people to find me.
I don’t need anger management classes ... you need “shut the hell up” classes
If you have any one-liners you’d like to share, make a comment below. If not, stop fooling around and get back to work.
NOTE: If you want to get attention and be recognized as a great communicator, check out Biz 1-Liners at http://fastforwardincome.com/Biz-1-Liners.html for one-liner observations that, unlike those above, are appropriate for business applications including memos, presentations and e-mails.